On My Own Blog

Category: Young Widow

young widow

  • THANKFUL EVEN IN LOSS

    This will be my second Thanksgiving without Tim.

    And I’m so thankful even in my loss. I feel so lucky, to have shared my life with such a funny, zestful and honest man. His spirit still thrives within me. I catch myself smiling at something he might say now, instead of crying. And I’m so blessed and honored for the time we did have together. He was truly a gift to my life.

    I’m also thankful for God. He’s given me peace and love during this confusing, lonely, and emotional year and a half. Because of God, I’m more calm and confident in what the future will bring. That he’s got my back. That every day is a gift from him. That I can’t change this loss, but I can look at what’s good in my life today and the good memories from my past.

    I thank him especially too for creating the oceans, trees, waterfalls, animals, mountains, my favorite turkish latté and butterscotch pudding from my fave local restaurants (hah!) and all the amazing people in my life.

    I’m so excited for the opportunities to come, the good times to be had and my next soul mate that will come into my life. That I need to be patient with this journey, too.

    And I’m so thankful for my friends and family. You have brought joy, energy, genuine advice, and good memories. It’s no mistake that the friends that have come into my life this past year were for a reason.

    And I’m also thankful for my dog Oliver. His wiggly butt and hopping around always cracks me up. His energy is contagious!

    My suggestion for those of you going through a loss or tough time, is to calm your heart– to pray,  meditate, journal or rest. Don’t over think what you can’t control or change. To remember the precious memories, how you can learn from them, grow from them, and that they’ll always be treasured in your heart. To share this day with good people, eat well, and a good ‘ol dance party always helps too!

    And for those that need some music to put them in a good mood, this song is perfect!

    Lots of love, hugs and blessings to you during this Thanksgiving holiday. 

    Wonderful artwork by Gina & Matt Triplett. They are one of my favorite illustrators, their work is organic and textural. Enjoy.

  • HAPPY HALLOWEEN

    Here’s a fun memory from Halloween 2008. We had our good neighbor friends— Rod, Emily, Matt and Chris—over to our place for a night of pumpkin carving. My newspaper-covered dining room was covered in pumpkin guts and seeds, and we were laughing and drinking. It was a simple night, but an awesome time.

    Tim, of course, had his bag of tricks—a special set of delicate carving knives and tools that only a chef or wood worker would have— and we weren’t allowed to use! Hah! But even if we had those knives we could have never come up with something so creative.

     

  • FOOD DAY 2012

    After I reading both Fast Food Nation and The Omnivore’s Dilemma I was surprised at the food I was eating and buying. That there’s way too many chemicals going into my food that shouldn’t be. That there’s a lot of scary, behind the scenes stuff that lobbyists and big corporations are trying to hide from us. I realized that we have to take ownership of buying quality ingredients and food so that we can get the nutrients that our body craves to make us happy and live longer. And don’t get me wrong, I love french fries, hamburgers and dessert, but there’s a ton of stuff out there that’s crap, REAL crap.

    Anyhoots, today is Food Day, a nationwide celebration and movement for healthy, affordable, and sustainable food.

    And as an honor to Tim, whose passion was food, introducing picky eaters to delicious, awesome things and sharing what he loved, I ask for you to eat something tasty and honor yourself. He always said that “when you buy food, it’s a vote.” It’s a vote to a better life for you, your family, the community, and the Earth.

    So, have fun with food, support your community (those hardworking farmers and yummy restaurants), and check out more info on this site. These photos below from the Food Day Facebook page

     

     

     

  • SHARE + INSPIRE + EMPOWER

    Monday hearts for Madelene

    After telling my therapist that I took photos of random hearts I found traveling through Europe, she told me about this amazing San Francisco artist, Page Hodel, who creates these beautiful and symbolic hearts.

    Page and her soul mate Madelene found perfect true love — the kind where the universe comes alive. Every Monday Page created a heart, constructed from a variety of materials, such as berries, clothespins, nails, etc, on Madelene’s doorstep  so she would go out the door to work Monday morning and begin her week with a reminder  of how much Page loved her. Tragically, Madelene was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in 2006, and died four months later, and less than a year after she and Page met.

    Page told Madelene before she passed that she would continue to make her a heart every Monday for the rest of her life, in honor of their beautiful love.

    “I  knew no matter how sad I felt I could ALWAYS make Madelene a heart. It always made me feel better.”

    True love embraces the world, and Page’s art is testimony to its enduring faith.

    Check out this link, Mondays Hearts for Madelene to receive Page’s weekly heart creations and continue the giving of love, by sharing the hearts and link with others.

     

  • TIME FOR ADVENTURE

    It’s officially summer, thanks to the June 20th summer solstice. Time to shalack on the sunscreen, enjoy icy treats and relish in the good times.

    Last summer was quite a blur for me. I was stoked to re-introduce myself to my quaint beachy, surf town, since the previous summers were filled with intense rollercoasters–and not the fun kind at the fair—more like the emotional kind. I was lovingly devoted to being at Tim’s side either at home or in the hospital, or chained to the intense deadlines at work.

    And although I was able to enjoy time at the beach last year, one might think sitting at a beach should bring one happiness, it did in many ways, don’t get me wrong, but at the same time, it filled my heart and mind with so many great memories that I shared with Tim, so it was very sad, numbing, and surreal.

    So this summer, I’m ready to enjoy life again, explore and create some new memories.

    Get the salt in my hair. Spend time with friends (from my past and new ones that I have yet to meet). Barbecues. Outdoor festivals and fairs. Fireworks lighting up the sky. Road trips. And more.

    Enjoying your summertime doesn’t involve lots of money or lots of work. Just the right mindset.

    Thought these few things might inspire your summer agenda too. Above art from here.

    This found here

    This found here

    Enjoy your summer peeps! xoxo