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HAPPY HALLOWEEN

Here’s a fun memory from Halloween 2008. We had our good neighbor friends— Rod, Emily, Matt and Chris—over to our place for a night of pumpkin carving. My newspaper-covered dining room was covered in pumpkin guts and seeds, and we were laughing and drinking. It was a simple night, but an awesome time.

Tim, of course, had his bag of tricks—a special set of delicate carving knives and tools that only a chef or wood worker would have— and we weren’t allowed to use! Hah! But even if we had those knives we could have never come up with something so creative.

October 31, 2012
FOOD DAY 2012

After I reading both Fast Food Nation and The Omnivore’s Dilemma I was surprised at the food I was eating and buying. That there’s way too many chemicals going into my food that shouldn’t be. That there’s a lot of scary, behind the scenes stuff that lobbyists and big corporations are trying to hide from us. I realized that we have to take ownership of buying quality ingredients and food so that we can get the nutrients that our body craves to make us happy and live longer. And don’t get me wrong, I love french fries, hamburgers and dessert, but there’s a ton of stuff out there that’s crap, REAL crap.

Anyhoots, today is Food Day, a nationwide celebration and movement for healthy, affordable, and sustainable food.

And as an honor to Tim, whose passion was food, introducing picky eaters to delicious, awesome things and sharing what he loved, I ask for you to eat something tasty and honor yourself. He always said that “when you buy food, it’s a vote.” It’s a vote to a better life for you, your family, the community, and the Earth.

So, have fun with food, support your community (those hardworking farmers and yummy restaurants), and check out more info on this site. These photos below from the Food Day Facebook page

October 24, 2012
SHARE + INSPIRE + EMPOWER

After telling my therapist that I took photos of random hearts I found traveling through Europe, she told me about this amazing San Francisco artist, Page Hodel, who creates these beautiful and symbolic hearts.

Page and her soul mate Madelene found perfect true love — the kind where the universe comes alive. Every Monday Page created a heart, constructed from a variety of materials, such as berries, clothespins, nails, etc, on Madelene’s doorstep so she would go out the door to work Monday morning and begin her week with a reminder of how much Page loved her. Tragically, Madelene was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in 2006, and died four months later, and less than a year after she and Page met.

Page told Madelene before she passed that she would continue to make her a heart every Monday for the rest of her life, in honor of their beautiful love.

“I knew no matter how sad I felt I could ALWAYS make Madelene a heart. It always made me feel better.”

True love embraces the world, and Page’s art is testimony to its enduring faith.

Check out this link, Mondays Hearts for Madelene to receive Page’s weekly heart creations and continue the giving of love, by sharing the hearts and link with others.

October 23, 2012
HAPPY WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

Today I will celebrate what would have been our sixth-year wedding anniversary. This day is bittersweet for me. It doesn’t hurt from the depths of my soul, like last year, but I mis him, still wish I could bring Tim back, so I could wrap my arms super tight around him, give him a long kiss and hear his laugh.

I’m farther along on this new chapter, but my love for Tim will endure until I see him again. I am so excited for that day. And I know he is too. I actually imagine our meeting in heaven to be like this above photo. I might look older, heavier, and with more wrinkles, but this is my vision.

Because our marriage and love was so strong, I’ll be celebrating and honoring Tim today. I loved being his wife, and I know he loved being a husband. We both have parents that are still together and we joked that the only thing that would separate us would be death. And God knows why this marriage was cut short.

To celebrate our wedding day, I’m going to take Ollie for a good beach run and pamper myself. I was organizing things and found a gift certificate our friends/neighbors had gifted to us for a “couples” massage. Tim had helped them with their wedding reception, he did their food and coordinated things, etc.

I decided this is what the universe telling me to do. After I take Ollie for his run and clean him up, I’ll go to the spa and celebrate our “couples” massage by myself, but with him in spirit. And I’ll do other rituals to honor and show my love.

My heart smiles remembering this day and Tim. I thank Tim for asking me to be his wife. I feel so blessed to have had a 8 robust years together. Just wishing I could change the circumstance.

Tim’s life serves as a reminder to us to take big bites out of life, to give it our best effort and embrace the opportunities, to enjoy being in the moment.

And I don’t know if I’ll ever meet anyone so honest. He would say things that everyone was thinking but scared to, but how he said things made the difference. You always knew his intention came from genuine love.

As I celebrate today, I’m also stretching my heart. Because I’m ready and open to find new love. And I know Tim doesn’t like me being alone and I hope he’s guiding things for my next mate.

And instead of being sad and frustrated at this circumstance I can’t change, I’d like to share photos from our wedding day. This day was one of the best ever. I was so calm and relaxed, just so ready and eager to spend the rest of my life with Tim. The beautiful part about weddings is that they bring so many great friends and family together. I’m so happy to have shared this day with so many people we both love.

And that’s the one thing I’ve learned going through this journey. That we all need love. The love from our family, friends and our soul mate is the only thing we really need. And it’s the only thing that carries on after we pass, not physical objects.

Enjoy the photos and memories. Lots of love and hugs to all and especially to my shugar, Tim. xoxo

October 15, 2012
SHARE + INSPIRE + EMPOWER

I went up to LA with my gal Jill to see Ben Howard in concert. If you haven’t heard about Ben, check out this cool “Frame of Mind/ An Open Mind” video Rob Machado did for Dragon Alliance, with Ben’s “The Wolves” song. Ben’s music is really calming but also energetic. He has a way of starting slow and serious, then turning it up and jamming out. He’s got a huge following, the audience was singing every word, and almost to the point that it overpowered his voice. But Ben and his band love to perform and share what they love to do and it was electric and contagious. He’s not religious or gospel, but his lyrics and music are deep, personal and powerful. I left the concert singing his song “Keep Your Head Up” (as the art above shows) over and over in my head.

Here’s a few photos I took with my iPhone.

Another interesting thing I wanted to share, was this cool music and design site called DesignersMX. It’s a fun site filled with various music mixes and cool design. The image above and below are from this site. Go check it out and get inspired.

October 9, 2012