Tag Archives | birthday



Today is Tim’s 43rd birthday. Let’s give a huuuuuge shout out and rockin’ high fives to celebrate the strong, fearless, genuine, goofy, energetic, quick-witted, creative and amazing warrior we knew as Tim. No tears, just an abundance of love and gratitude. That’s what he’d want.

And although we can’t see, talk and hug him — or hear his contagious laugh, we know he’s with us. My heart  feels it deeply. He’s sprinkling a lil bit of extra love and good vibes to all of us today and this week. A day to remember those enriching memories that he dutifully and enthusiastically filled into our hearts. It’s his birthday, but he was such a gift to each of us.

He reminds us to be unstoppable. To give each day our fullest. That we are each fighting and battling something. But that we’ve got to rise above, cruise above the negativity and let go. We need to be free. See the love. Be the love. And realize the bigger understanding of who we are and how to move forward.

To carry on where his life stopped. It’s about time. It’s about today. Yeeeeeeeeeeeebra!



tim-video (Enhanced) from Michelle Gutmann on Vimeo.

When time allows, take a moment to watch this video. It’s 20 minutes. Yes a bit long, and well, Tim probably wished it was longer, hah! Anyways, for those that didn’t know Tim, you’ll surely get a sense of his love for adventure and silliness.

The song that plays halfway through, “Over the Rainbow” by  Israel Kamakawiwo’ole always tears me up. It was the song I requested for our wedding day. It played as our bridesmaids and groomsmen walked down the aisle. It was the song that magically played when we were in a helicopter through all the waterfalls on our honeymoon in Maui (such an awesome wedding gift from Stice!!), and it magically played when I was in Florence, Italy last September. Tim was my dream come true. It hurts that the dream has ended. It was a “wonderful world” – those 8 years with him. But I’m stoked that Tim is “home.”  Lots and lots of love to him today, love you shugar. xoxo

Photos above by me // Top: Maui on our honeymoon, Middle: Portland, Bottom: Australia, Gold Coast. 




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Today is Tim’s best friend’s birthday! I wanted to celebrate and dedicate this post to him and wish him the best and most deserving day/week/month.

For those that don’t know Mike let me give you a brief description.

He’s a hard-working, smart, well-read, well-traveled and life-loving, mid-west raised, Southern California guy. He’s an English Professor at the Laguna College of Art & Design, and Director of Operations at the Laguna Art Museum. But don’t ever play Scattergories with him. If you have a “unique” answer, he’ll debate you until you can’t figure out what or why you’re debating. Hah! I’m just sayin’.

But seriously, though, he’s just passionate about everything. About writing. About surfing. About music. About love. About beer. About nature. About life. And he especially loved Tim. They were brothers.

And I know Tim loved him so much.

Mike’s been such a great friend/brother to me during this past year. We’ve had so many deep, good heart to heart chats and phone conversations, trying to understand how to move forward, and how to bring the joy that Tim brought, back into our hearts and lives.

Tim and Mike have known each other since middle school/ high school and I can’t remember the exact story on how they  met.

They had the kind of friendship I wanted with one of my girlfriends. They would keep tabs on each other every single day. It would be phone call. Or a text. Or an email. And I always thought that was special.

And the best, was how they’d shout out each other at the beginning, on the phone. They’d hoot… “yeeeeeeeeeeee-brah.”

And at times he made my marriage to Tim better. He was honest with Tim and stood up for me when Tim was too stubborn. Mike was on my side too, and I thank him for that too.

So because today is Mike’s birthday, I’d like to acknowledge that quietness, that emptiness that Mike has been through this past year that doesn’t get much awareness like myself or Tim’s family members. Throughout this year, I’ve been surrounded with so much love, so many calls, texts, emails, cards in the mail from so many friends, family and those that are sympathetic to this situation I’m in, but Mike doesn’t really get to be acknowledged or get to share much about Tim and his sadness.

Now, Mike doesn’t know I’m writing this post, and the reason I’m wanting to acknowledge Mike’s situation, is that I can understand how he feels. I’m so sorry Mike.

But I want Mike to realize, on his birthday without Tim. That you have so much love with you today.  And I want to ask all of you to celebrate Mike especially today. To pray for him too.

Allow him to understand that although Tim’s in heaven, that he’s still keeping tabs on him. He knows how Mike’s classes are going. How the surf’s been. How things are going with his sweetheart.

So with that said, here’s some photos of what an amazing friendship looks like. A friendship that hasn’t ended, but just isn’t the same.

Lots of love and big hugs Mike. Thank you for being such a blessing and brother to me too this past year and always. Love ya ‘brah.

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